Exhibition: Mexico After Hours, Walk: Paddington - Proud, Perky & Picturesque, Comedy: Dara O' Briain - So, Where Were We?, & Storytelling: Inisfáil

Friday was something advertised with the Crick Crack Club (CCC) - they're celebrating all things Mexican in Kew Gardens this month, with Mexico After Hours on some nights! With something about the Day of the Dead, of course.. and on Friday, the CCC came along.

That far out, it had to be Tube - even coming home, late at night. Outbound, I took the Piccadilly Line - happily, before it got to be full, so I got a seat. And changed to the District Line - as you have to, for Kew Gardens. And when I got off, it was drizzling - as it had been all afternoon. Just as well the e-ticket they sent me included a map, though, showing me where to enter - although Google Maps recognises Temperate House, where the event was taking place, in no way did it seem to know exactly where it was! Without the map supplied with the e-ticket, I'd have been completely lost. As it was, I had about 15 minutes' extra walk once I got as far as the gardens. You couldn't miss it in the end though - I arrived at about 6.15, 15 minutes before it was due to open, and the queue outside the gates was growing rapidly..

They were about five minutes late letting us in. The path to Temperate House was lit for us - most attractively, I must say. And as we made our way, someone behind me remarked to her companion that she'd looked into hiring it as a wedding venue - but it would've cost £20,000..

See those buildings either side? They're all connected - this is, apparently, the world's largest Victorian greenhouse. 

The central atrium is the centrepiece of the activity, with constant music and a bar:

Oh, and to satisfy the macabre cravings of - well, people like me - there are plenty of shrines to the ancestors:

Well, we'd been handed the evening's programme on the way in, and I could see that the first of two CCC sessions was scheduled for 6.45 - five minutes' time, by this stage. Unfortunately, this central section of the glasshouse is on a raised area, steps either side - and yes, the CCC sessions were in a separate building to the rear. I spent the whole blasted night steeling myself to go up and down these steps - no handrails, of course. No accessible alternative, either - when I went for food, later, I did manage to find a flat path to the side, which I used to come around to the back again. However, the event trucks were parked there, and when I tried to exit that way at the end, an usher spotted me and sternly ordered me back hrough the central hall. There were a few people on mobility scooters - I suppose, if they had wanted the accessible path, they'd have been allowed.

Well, I managed it - and scored a central seat, in the ring of chairs they'd erected, for the performance.

(Note the plate of scraps of paper in front of the altar - the CCC left blank paper and pens at the front of the stage, for people to write deceased loved-ones' names on, if they wanted, and leave them at the alter. So they'd be included in the ceremony.)

All night, Clare Muphy and Sarah-Liisa Wilkinson took turns to deliver short stories centred around death, cheating death, the Land of the Dead.. One interesting tale described the origin of mist, and I heard again the story of how Hare brought the tale, from the Moon, that people woud die, but was in such a hurry that he completely forgot the second part of the message, that they would rise again. Clare Murphy has a wonderful, comic delivery, and Sarah-Liisa Wilkinson an absolutely madcap one, always urging the audience to contribute sound effects. I was sad to leave them at the end of the set - but we had to make way for a Mexican cookery/cocktail making demonstration, so off I went. It was damn chilly in there, anyway - I don't know how "temperate" these glasshouses were that night, with all the doors left open!

And so to investigate the bar. By this time, it was about 7.25, and I managed to grab the very last small bottle of white wine in one of the ice buckets - a pinot grigio. And a plastic container to go with it. Tricky to open, but I'm good at that - and I was determined. And meantime, there was a parade of costumed people! ( I did take a video, but am having trouble downloading it..)

And then I went for a stroll. It's fantastically lit, quite surreal in the dark:

Marigolds are supposed to ease the passage of those from the Land of the Dead:

Quite striking from outside:

I finished what was rather a weird-tasting pinot grigio, and headed for the cocktail bar, where I had to queue - you could have an old-fashioned, or a margarita. Margarita all the way for me, thanks! and it did taste good. Toilets are located down a spiral staircase, in the "magnolia room". And then, being hungry, I went in search of food! Following the map on my programme, I found that the only food to be had was back the way we'd come in - great, down the steps again. Where I found just the one food stall, serving tacos - pork or veggie. I had pork. After a long queue, the guy to the side taking orders with his card machine. I dunno why he bothered to ask what we wanted - they were the same price, and we had to give the order again at the counter! Ah well, it was tasty anyway. The miniscule amount of it we had, for £9.50, was scandalous - mind you, they were the only food stall there! Disgraceful - of course, I should have left earlier to find food elsewhere, but wanted to stay for the storytelling at the end of the night.

I sat and watched people stream in for the demos - and when a queue started for the storytelling, I joined it. Unfortunately, there is very little seating. And, of course, all the people who'd been lucky enough to score a seat for the demos were reluctant to give it up, and thought they might experience a bit of storytelling as well! So, for all of the ladies in front of me in the queue saying it wasn't fair, we hadn't a hope of getting a seat. Being first up, though, we did manage to get a perch on a ledge at the edge of the flowerbeds, at the side. Where we (usually) had a clear view to the side of the stage, but it was a challenge to hear. Ah well. At least some newbies were experiencing storytelling - and it might stick with some.

Different stories for this section, of course - Sarah-Liisa regaled us with the tale of a Scandinavian hero, whose mother came to rescue him and bring him back to life, after he was killed while out adventuring. Both got a great reception. Meanwhile.. a ghostly silver cat slinked its way through the crowd, disappearing into the foliage. Then came back and did it again, completely ignoring us all. And as I left, at the end, I could hear its meowling, bidding us farewell.. most appropriate.

The Tube home was interesting - first up was the ever-interesting District Line, where I found myself sitting beside a bunch of people in togas, one arguing with another about the suitability of his modern underwear, which was poking out, to the period he was trying to evoke. And unfortunately, I decided to change to the Victoria Line - which was stifling! What a relief to get off..

Couldn't blog that night, as I had to be up early. Yesterday was another of those busy days. So.. first I was headed on a walk with Laurence Summers and the 45+ Not Grumpy Old Londoners - this one was Paddington - Proud, Perky & Picturesque.

Not hard to get to Paddington - a simple bus ride, with a choice of buses. (And would you believe it, I was just in time to miss a #205 - the fabled, but rarely seen bus of the fleet. What are the odds?) Having got off the bus, though - not being familiar with the station, it was impossible for me to find it!! Jeez, they have roundels for the Tube - could they not stretch to a sign saying something like "station entrance over here"? Anyway, it appeared as a big blob on Google Maps - so, heading in that general direction, I eventually came across what looked like an entrance. Found the platforms - and Laurence had helpfully mentioned that the Paddington Bear statue beside which we were to meet was on Platform 1. And so it proved - but not at the top of it, oh no. I had to walk a long way down the platform - and saw the group before I saw the statue. Ah well, he's only a little bear.

We waited for latecomers, and then we were off. And one of the most interesting things in the tour was right outside!

There's a man in the clock - about lifesize. And he's constantly on the move - cleaning it, repainting the hands as the time changes. Seriously, you could spend so much time just watching this..!

On to the Mitre pub:

And on to the Italian gardens, designed by Prince Albert as a present for his wife, Queen Victoria, not long before he died:

The man had taste, I must admit.

To the side is a statue to Jenner:

And to the other side, an upmarket (Rolls Royce) ice cream van!

We enjoyed our trip to the park - but it was hard for Laurence to get us all back in time, and we were a bit late starting off again! Never mind, we were nearly finished.. just a quick stop outside St. Mary's Hospital, which has seen the births of so many members of the Royal Family in recent times!

A most interesting and entertaining walk! And so to lunch in Fountains Abbey pub - where you might be forgiven for thinking they'd never heard of us, although Laurence had rung to book, as he always does. Well, they have a couple of function rooms upstairs, and duly shunted us into one of them - where we did a bit of reorganising so we were all sat together. We had to go back down to order, mind. But we were well fed - me on the half roast chicken with BBQ sauce - and passed a most pleasant afternoon chatting.

Me, I was killing time - I wasn't going home, because, for nearly a year now, I've had tickets booked, for me and Helen, for Dara O' Briain in the Hammersmith Apollo that night! Crikey, I'd never even have thought of it if it hadn't been noted in my calendar. So anyway, she couldn't come on the walk, but we arranged to meet for dinner beforehand in Bill's of Hammersmith. I could only hope for better service than I got in Bill's of Clink Street..

So, I got the bus. Buses. And ended up going the wrong way, slightly. Ah well, I was still on time - got the table, and then she arrived and someone was right along to take our order. This time, I had steak - skipped a starter, under the circumstances. And we shared a bottle of sauvignon blanc. And it was good - although the steak was nothing special. Indeed, we might have had dessert - certainly, I asked for the dessert menu - but Bill's was back to its old self, and the only thing we could get the staff to do for us from then on was bring us the bill. Yep, not the place to come for a special occasion.

As usual, I couldn't access the "free WiFi" - can't get it in train stations, on trains, or in hotels or restaurants or airports at all any more. It technically exists, but has "no internet". Which meant I couldn't download our tickets. Of course, as soon as I was out the door, no such problems.. it was a short walk to the Apollo, and we went straight in. And having booked quite quickly, we had very good seats!

No support act, he came straight on. I love his comedy, and really enjoyed this - his comeback tour after lockdown. Revelation of the night, however, was that he's adopted! He was describing the palaver to get a look at his birth cert, following which he tracked down his birth family. Crikey, you never do know, eh?

Too tired last night to blog, but it was a great day, and great to see Helen again. Today, back with the CCC for Inisfáil, Irish storytelling courtesy of the wonderful Clare Murphy, in the British Museum. Mercifully, not on till afternoon, so I could have a lie-in - and walk there!

Took the back entrance, as cleverly suggested to me by Google Maps, and arrived just in time. And wow, I have never seen one of these events so well-attended! Popular subject today, methinks. There were people directing audience members to seats. I got one a few rows from the front - and a young couple were delighted to grab a couple of spare seats together, right beside me.

Well, she took us on again in her inimitable way, charming her way into the audience with a healthy dose of humour. Today, it was all about the Tuatha Dé Dannan - even the name sounds like a drumbeat. About how they came to Ireland (then known as Inisfáil) and fought the Firbolg. And finally, about how they in turn were displaced by the Celts. When she asked, yes, many of the audience had heard of the characters in the tales - but probably hadn't seen them brought to life in the energetic way that she did. We spent a fabulous hour or so - and the man of the young couple beside me turned to his partner (as so many have before) and thanked her profusely for dragging him there. Well, yes. Others on the way out were remarking to their friends how Clare Murphy is one of the best. Well, yes! I heartily agree.

On then to The Museum Tavern. It was pretty full, but I found a table right at the end - with a QR code on it! And hey, here - and in the museum itself - is the first free WiFi I've come across in ages! So, I was going to have a stab at that for once - but just as I was looking at the website, the waiter came along and took my order. Now, this is also a Greene King pub - like the Fountains Abbey pub - so a similar menu. So I decided not to have the chicken again, and went for a steak and ale pie instead. And the requisite glass of sauvignon blanc. Which were serverd quite promptly. The glass could have been cleaner - but otherwise, it was very moreish, gorgeous beef dripping gravy accompanying the pie. The chips weren't the best I've had, but the pie might well have been. I was absolutely stuffed for the walk home.

Tomorrow, I originally booked a free online talk about Railways of Surrey, from the Surrey History Meetup. But I just recently saw (despite the fact that it was evidently posted months ago) an event in Sadler's Wells from Up in the Cheap Seats (UITCS) - Samsara is inspired by the Chinese novel, Journey to the West, and contains partial nudity, we're told. Tickets for this are quite cheap, and we're all in the Stalls, for once - they haven't even opened the Second Circle, where we normally are! So, no stairs, for a change!

On Tuesday, I've booked for Iphigenia in Splott, in the Lyric Hammersmith.

On Wednesday, was supposed to have drinks with Ivan. But now it turns out he has Covid, so that's off the menu. Instead, I'm headed to hear the London Handel Players perform At Their Majesties' Pleasure, a programme of Baroque dance music, at St. John's Smith Square. Courtesy of TAC.

On Thursday, back with Civilised London for dinner at Le Sacré Coeur. Always good.

On Friday, back to Ireland again - and the following Monday, it's my mother's birthday, so I'm staying in Ireland for that and flying back on Tuesday 25th. I've already cleared it with work.

On the 26th, I've booked with UITCS again - for Mary, at Hampstead Theatre again. Political machinations in the court of Mary, Queen of Scots. Funny thing - there were two seats in the main seating section at the cheapest price, but the site objected to me just booking one of them. No problem booking an equivalent seat in a higher price bracket, though! So I booked one of the high seats, at the back, instead. At the lower price.

I hadn't anything booked for the 27th - was thinking film - and then Ticket Text (one of hundreds of ticket organisations I seem to have signed up for) sent me an advertising email. So, it seems that night the comedy venue, 21Soho, is holding an event of Comedians Telling Spooky Stories. Which sounds the business, for the week that's in it. So I booked. Hallowe'en fancy dress, apparently - well, I'll have a think. I do have some duds that might do.. 😜

The 28th, I've kept free for an all-night drinking session with Ivan. Man, I've missed these! In vino veritas, as they say, and these are wonderful chances to get stuff off your chest. He fancied doing it earlier, but I didn't want to have to take time off work - this was the first overnighter I could fit in. And with him taking ill, it seems it was just as well! I hope he can make this one.

Which should make the 29th interesting - I'm on another walk with Laurence and the 45+s! Might not actually get to bed in between.. this one is the Edgy London Walking Tour, and is one of his new ones.

And yes, I have something to do that evening! (This month is far too busy.) I'm back with the CCC, for the Game of Candles - their Hallowe'en offering, where they extinguish a candle for every spooky story told. Tim Ralphs and Sarah-Liisa Wilkinson - in King's Place, lovely! I can walk (or stagger) home..

Vespers

This evening, back with Bucket List London (BLL) - who obligingly was doing something midweek! I had to skip off work early - this was for vespers in Westminster Cathedral, and we were to meet at 4.30. He was actually in Westminster all day, attending Ministerial Question Time earlier - but not only do I (for the moment) have a job to go to, but jeez, I do believe this would just infuriate me! So that, I didn't attend.. I did have to be up early though, to get in early, to justify the early departure.

Well, off I trotted, heeding the organiser's dire warning to be on time, or risk missing him! The bus that Google Maps promised would get me there did indeed get me there on time! and I schlepped over to the cathedral.

Nice, sunny day. As I waited. Not like him to be late, TBH. I thought I'd give him five minutes - when that was up, I thought I'd give him five more - there was supposed to be another person too, and it was just weird not to meet either of them! No messages on the event page. But I said to myself - I really must go in after 10 minutes if I'm to see anything of the place before Vespers actually starts at 5! Well, I was seconds from going in - and there he was, with a companion from the previous event in tow. Turned out they'd overrun - which is fair enough. Should've taken a minute to message that he was running late, is all.

Never mind - in we went. It's decades since I was last here, and I hardly remembered anything..

Like that there's a chapel dedicated to Irish saints:

(Note the snakes on the altar; St. Patrick is said to have banished snakes from Ireland, you know..)

Well, Vespers - when our organiser asked someone - turned out to be in a side chapel. It transpired that this was the Lady Chapel, which was being dedicated this evening! So, something of a grand occasion:

We couldn't sit as far forward as we'd have liked, what with all the clerics bagging the front pews. The chap in the grey mozzetta, seated at the front of the photo, was the celebrant - the rest were in the congregation with us. The choristers were adult, not choirboys, as you might expect - unusual in our experience, but they were beautiful singers. More of a problem was the disconnect between the songbooks, in English, and the hymns as sung - mostly in Latin. Do you know, though, this was the first Catholic service of any kind I've attended in years.. the heady smell of the incense really brought me back. Not that I've experienced a Damascene conversion - no, quite happy to stay an outside observer, thank you.

Really nice event, though - unusual for me. And a beautiful setting. That's typical of this group - events of a sort that wouldn't normally occur to you, but which turn out to be really worth doing. I find. Roll on the next unexpected destination! Also great to see familiar faces - and a new one.

Our free lunch at work didn't enthuse me today - so I was a bit peckish, and fancied food afterwards. And what should there be, right across the road, but a Bill's.. Well, despite my last time at Bill's, my experience with them has been generally positive. So I said I'd give them a shot. I was initially phased by the large queue - but somewhat reassured to discover most of them were in the same group. When the maitre d' finally reappeared and I asked him about the availability of a table for one, he looked nonplussed for a moment, then asked whether I'd mind sitting at the bar - that was about all he could offer before 7. I said, sure, as long as I could get fed there! No problem - he took most of my order himself.

I have to say, maybe being at the bar - in the centre of things - helped, but I wasn't short on service. Sure, there were some pauses - but they were insanely busy. Indeed, they had run out of wine glasses, and were serving in whatever would do - my wine came in beer glasses. But I never felt neglected, like my last time in a Bill's - it really must depend on the particular location. Had the calamari, as usual - delish. Had the half chicken this time - wow, the equal of that time I was so impressed with the chicken in The Archduke! served with slightly spiced, diced potato. And a very moreish brownie for dessert. The put-upon lady behind the bar was a bit less busy by the time I asked her for the bill. Have to say, this was a much more positive experience than my last time at Bill's.. will remember that in future. Still dubious about that branch in Clink Street, mind.

It had the cheek to rain on me on the way home - quite unexpectedly!

Tomorrow, back with Civilised London (CL) for dinner at Caravel. Terrific reviews.. Meeting at The Narrowboat. Now, this is closer to my flat than to the office - but really, for the sake of having to take a bus, I didn't want to have to drag the laptop with me this evening and home tonight: not to mention back in on Monday, because the office will be handier again. No, I'll just bus it to the dinner tomorrow.

At the weekend, I'm back with the man with the famous name - Dr. Stephen King (not the writer) is guiding a couple of walks for London Guided Walks (courtesy of Walks, Talks and Treasure Hunts). Both topics / areas I've covered many times before, but gee, he's such a great guide! So I hope I make these - early. On Saturday, it's his Southwark Walk. Sadly, although it's now advertised on TAC, I booked it through the official site (discount of £3 with the code MEETUP3, as usual).

On Sunday, it's his Royal Coronation Walk - not advertised on TAC yet. I just bet he comes up with something I didn't already know..

On Monday, I'm headed to A Doll's House Part 2, at Donmar Warehouse - sequel to the famous original, where the wife leaves an unhappy marriage; this sequel examines what happens when she returns.

On Tuesday - well, I finally saw Up In The Cheap Seats (UITCS)' ad for Unfortunate: The Untold Story of Ursula the Sea Witch, at the Underbelly Festival! A parody musical, right up my street - I hate how Meetup so often doesn't show me the events I really would enjoy! Just as well I saw this in time, before I booked anything else. So it'll be a hectic evening, with an interview scheduled for 5.30! I'd better quit work early I think, and head home for that - I can't guarantee quiet in the office.

On Wednesday, back with CT for a concert by the Royal College of Music Brass Ensemble, at the college on Shelton Street.

Next Thursday, back with Guided Walking Tours in Brighton and Sussex, for The London Necropolis Virtual Tour. I pointed out to him that the registration link had the wrong date, and he said it was outdated, and he'd replace it and send me the new link - well, he's removed it, but no new link yet. And then - you guessed it, I'm back to Ireland for the weekend again!

On the 11th, I'm going to Favour, at the Bush Theatre - after much effort, as their website wasn't working for days! In fact, it seems to go down sporadically. I chose an unreserved seat, will be allocated one on the day. Anyway, I see TAC has now started selling tickets for this - gee, might be not only the cheapest, but the easiest way to book! Only up to the 6th, however. Wow, was only there once before, 3.5 years ago..

On the 12th, I'm going to The Southbury Child, at the Bridge Theatre. I noticed that UITCS is going, later in the week - ah well.

On the 13th, back with CL for dinner - this time at The Crown itself, where we usually meet for drinks before heading somewhere else for dinner. Excellent choice. Which marks the beginning of a whole spate of Meetups in a row! When's the last time that happened..?

On the 14th, back with The Garden Talks - this online talk is How Do Languages Evolve?

On the 15th, back with the London Classical Music and Theatre Group for the opera Otello, at the Royal Opera House.

On the 16th, which is a Saturday, I had booked with Discover London for a trip to see a cart making ceremony - and then Eleanor, organiser of TunedIn London, advertised a concert through the World Music Meetup, for that evening, at City Hope Church. So now I'm going to both.

On Sunday the 17th, back with BLL - this time, it's a trip to Sandown Antiques Market. Well, I've never been to Sandown, so this could be interesting.

On the 18th, back with North London Friends! for the first time since before lockdown. This is for an Edinburgh Comedy Festival preview, at the King's Head in Crouch End, featuring Lucy Porter and Rachel Fairburn.

On the 19th.. I'm taking a punt that I won't actually be employed that day, and have signed up again - at last - for a walk with Laurence and the 45+ Not Grumpy Old Londoners. This is The Magic of Midtown - and as I said to him, it finishes very near my new home! I also promised to let him know if I can't actually make it - although, even if I have started work by then (which would be surprising), perhaps I could take a day off.

On the 20th, I finish my Meetup run with a trip with UITCS to Leicester Square Theatre to see Frankie Boyle, who has a work in progress show.

On the 21st, I'm thinking of heading - at last - to Summer by the River at More London. This is for a free evening of music, curated by Soho Radio. Then I'm back to Ireland for the weekend.

On the 25th, I'm headed to see The Throne, a comedy about to open at Charing Cross Theatre, in which the Queen gets locked in a portaloo with a staunch republican. Time Out has an offer of £10 tickets for the cheapest seats for this - a saving of more than 50%!

On the 26th - tan-ta-ra! I finally managed to get a decently priced ticket to Jerusalem, at the Apollo. I have heard so much about this, and it's always at the top of the Time Out listings - nearly as hard as Hamilton to get a reasonably priced ticket for, so I'm delighted to get one, if only not to have to look any more.

On the 27th, back to Summer by the River again.. for Bumper Blyton: Improvised Adventures for Grown-Ups! Improvised comedy in the style of Enid Blyton books.. sounds jolly good!

And on the 28th - another UITCS event that Meetup finally decided to flag to me. So I've booked to go with them to see Briefs Factory's show, Bite Club! at Queen Elizabeth Hall. Drag, burlesque.. should be fun!

Restaurant: Bill's (Clink Street) & The Gunpower Plot Immersive VR Experience

Yesterday, I finally got my postponed meeting with two of my ex-coworkers (one suddenly couldn't make it, he was dog-sitting) - and after my glowing reports of Bill's on Clink Street, we headed there! Optional drinks beforehand, I suggested The Old Thameside Inn. No word from Ivan by the morning as to when he wanted to meet, I had to chase him.

Well, first off he said he couldn't make it before 4, and would ping me at 2. And when he did, a bit after 2, it was to apologise and say he couldn't make it at all before the meal, and would see me at the restaurant! Just as well I didn't spend the afternoon there, cooling my heels - I stayed home and got other stuff done. Headed down in good time, and in glorious sunshine - dodging crowds of party-goers, one of whom had a full Union Jack suit. I was first to arrive at the restaurant, and killed some time in the gift shop across the street. Where I finally picked up a new Oyster card holder - something I've needed for years!

I went in when it was time - the others had been delayed, and Ivan only left home seven minutes before our agreed meeting time. Got shown to my table, told the others where it was. The third of our party got there shortly afterwards, and we decided to order drinks - she said, if Ivan hadn't arrived within another half hour, we should go ahead and order food. Anyway, he pinged us while we were waiting, and gave us an ETA, so we waited. I had one glass of wine downed by the time he arrived..

For starters, I had calamari again, the others had burrata and soup, respectively. And I think we were all happy with those - although the calamari was maybe a bit salty. For mains, I'd had steak before, but didn't fancy it this time, and chose the "chicken 2 ways" instead. The others each ordered salad, but as she's vegan, she asked whether vegan cheese could be substituted for the regular cheese on the menu - and was told that would be fine.

And that's where the trouble started. When the mains arrived, it was obvious which mine was - but the salads essentially looked the same, and the waiter obviously had no idea that there was supposed to be a difference. Now, for a restaurant that's supposed to take allergens seriously, and has a QR code on the menu that you can scan for more information, this was bad.. she was adamant that it was essential that they get them the right way around, as she's highly allergic to regular cheese. Back he had to go to the kitchen, where the chef stuck a flag in the vegan one - and must have got it right, because nothing untoward happened.

Things really went downhill from there - I wonder whether our waiter took exception to us after this? (Not the guy that brought the mains, but a different lady whom we had the trouble of dealing with for the rest of the night). For love nor money, we could not get her to bring us anything - even if we managed to grab her as she was passing, she'd nod and disappear, and we'd have to ask one or two more people before the thing was done. As to the food - the salads got eaten, but my chicken was quite disappointing; the breaded chicken was lovely, as was the accompanying truffle sauce, but the grilled chicken that completed the dish was tough, and I couldn't finish it.

Meantime, stuff was piling up on the table, because for all the times a waiter came to us, no-one ever thought to remove anything, even though much of it was obviously finished with!

Our third group member had to leave early - had promised to be home at a certain time to do stuff before they headed away for the rest of the weekend. So she made her excuses, paid her part of the bill (less the service charge), and left. Ivan and I stayed until closing - and it was terrific to see them both! Had we been able to find a pub, we'd have carried on for longer - but they were closed by now, too. (And the Old Thameside Inn had been really busy, so perhaps it was just as well that we didn't head there in the afternoon.) Anyway, looking forward to the next time - although the one who left early wasn't at all impressed at Ivan's tardiness, and I don't think they'll be hanging out again. And, of course, none of us will darken the doors of this establishment, ever again!

I came home and pretty much went straight to bed - just crashed, leaving the light on and all. Today - taking advantage of the bank holiday, I booked something that's been heavily advertised. At £60, it wasn't cheap, but I really fancied it, so I headed to The Gunpowder Plot, an immersive, combined VR and real-life experience at the Tower. You can get a themed lunch with that, but I passed. Earliest date now available is the 8th, at a minimum price of £50 (last few available) - the price increases as you get closer to the date. And ironic how these two events are closer to my old place.. So I stayed there until tonight.

They ask you to come half an hour early, at least - and I had to put the postcode into Google Maps to find the place! Obvious once you come across it..

So, you check in and they check you off the list, and give you a coloured wristband according to your time slot. They then direct you to the bank of screens that show the waiver you have to sign - so, as you come in, the people reading this are facing the entrance; don't make the mistake of thinking they're the ones who check you in! My though, the waiver is terrifying - a big long thing, it describes how you'll have to crawl, or climb over things as directed, although if you want, you can be shown alternative paths. Experience not suitable for those who experience motion sickness, or have a fear of heights - the floor will move. Heavens, I damn near chickened out! But I said, well surely they won't put us through too much..

Downstairs then, and a cheery lady explains to everyone coming down that they should wait in the bar, where circles on the wall have coloured lights behind them, which change to the colour of the wristbands corresponding to the next group, when it's their time to assemble at the entrance. Lockers are provided, and a keycard is given to you at checkin - you choose your own locker. NO instructions are provided - the lady beside me had trouble getting her locker open, and had to ask for assistance, and the same guy checked my locker after I'd finished with it, and chased after me to alert me that I hadn't locked my locker properly, so I had to go back and he helped me.

You can take in small bags, but not rucksacks - I kept my bag with me, which turned out to be just as well, because in the middle, there's a 15-minute interval in a themed bar, and I needed my cash. I did leave my coat though - so needed my bag, because without my coat, I had no pockets to put the keycard in! With nearly half an hour to kill, I headed to the bar at reception.

Table service only, so I sat at one. And waited, and waited.. jeez, what is it about this weekend that leads to such terrible service? I was wondering whether I needed to use the QR code on the table, but after about 10 minutes someone came and asked whether I'd like anything. I was thirsty, so ordered, and paid for, a lemonade. And waited, and waited.. After another 10 minutes, and with just 10 minutes to go to showtime, I stormed up to the bar and complained to the waiter who had taken my order, and was now standing there! When I explained that I was short on time, she put a hurry on the barman, who stopped whatever order he was preparing, and finally performed the complicated task of filling a glass with ice and squirting lemonade into it. Jesus wept. I was not impressed - but at least I got it drunk in time.

Now, the lady at the entrance hadn't been too specific about where exactly we were to wait, when our time came - so when I saw some folk heading into a side corridor, I followed them. Should have gone there earlier - there are things to look at, like example espionage notes, a lantern of the sort that would have been carried, a mask.. the lady scuttled in at one point to check that we all had the right colour wristbands. I think we should maybe have been waiting in the reception area proper, rather than going straight through to here - but then, maybe she should have paid us some attention, rather than ignoring us?

And so to the intro - sorry, no photography allowed inside the show. I have to say, it started most impressively, with a professional introductory talk and visual display, and a map of the area in 1605 on a table. And instructions on what to do with the headsets, and not to touch the actors. The waiver had said they might touch us, which was unnerving - but they never actually did, apart from brushing past us in narrow corridors. In point of fact, you can almost ignore that waiver - there is one bit where the surface under you moves, but you're sitting down for it, and all the other scary stuff happens in VR, so you can always close your eyes if you're not comfortable. Or take off the headset. And there's always someone to tell you where to go. There is one smoke effect, but again you're sitting down, not groping in the dark - and despite what the waiver says, there is no period of complete darkness.

The live acting, I have to say, is excellent - and they're terrific with the kids. One smallie in our group was scared to start with, what with the loud, scary noises and the dark - but they had a clever way of dealing with it; they just told the kids they were the bosses, and she was the chief boss, and had to keep us all in line! Soon into the experience, we were taken to a room where they had cloaks for us to wear - tricky to figure them out in the dark, and quickly, but they were a good idea, because without my coat I was feeling a bit chilly - it is quite cool in the experience. And they do get you in the mood - she, in particular, loved hers, and was jumping up and down, flapping it!

There actually isn't much VR - three episodes, as I recall. And damnit, only one of them worked properly - and that was jumpy! For the second, one of the staff was asking us why we were all taking off our headsets - well, because the message to remove them had flashed up! After that, many of the headsets' video displays wouldn't work, including mine - I should have tried another, but it seemed like a hassle. They kept apologising, and saying we could see it afterwards - well, that's not much use, now is it? For the final VR, would you believe, a couple of headsets weren't working again - but I switched this time, and got to see the end of the story. Which had Guy Fawkes travelling though time to see how he was to be remembered in the future - a bit naff, I thought.

Perhaps the worst technological malfunction of the event, however, was when we were locked in a not-very-large room for about 15-20 minutes, our progress obviously delayed by something that had gone wrong, and they were trying to fix. Unfortunately, one of the kids was claustrophobic, and it was quite dark, and as the minutes passed, he got more and more scared, culminating in a panic attack. After much banging on the door we were to go through, someone opened it and asked us to be patient - happily, it wasn't long after that until we were on the move again.

A repetitive display at the exit was largely ignored - and exit, of course, is through the gift shop, where almost everything is themed for the show. Oh, and when I was leaving, the box to drop the locker keycard in had a pile of keycards beside it - the lady had to tell me to use the box, instead of adding to the pile. Again, no instructions. Now, for what they're charging for this - I'd have to say, it really isn't worth it. Never mind that most of the VR didn't work right, or didn't work at all! (The earpieces were also hard to adjust.) And obviously wouldn't have been fixed in time for the next group, as they were coming through constantly. Had it all been live action, it would actually have been more enjoyable. Currently booking until the 4th of September. There are much better things to do in London, though.

Coming out, I was hungry - hadn't seen that themed restaurant they're supposed to have, so had a look at what was around, and headed over to St. Katharine's Docks, where it turns out there are lots of eateries. Saw a branch of Ping Pong and thought, well, I haven't had Chinese in London for years! so I went over and got a table. And the kindly maitre d' explained the menu to me - it's multiple choice, you could say, you just select the dishes you want!

Well, that was to be the best service I got there. For heavens' sake, it feels like they're out to get me this weekend! I was literally drumming my fingers when a waiter finally caught sight of me, made her way over, and asked, rather surprisedly I thought, whether I'd like to order! Gee, yes please.. so I had prawn crackers (six, I think they gave me for about £3, with a very nice spicy mango dip), and a chicken katsu rice bowl with curry sauce in a little bowl - nice and light. And a nice glass of Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc. And when I was done, she asked whether I'd like anything else, so I ordered a couple of scoops of chocolate ice cream.

Service was on the slow side of acceptable. But the final straw for this atrocious couple of days of customer service came when I was waiting for ages to catch someone's eye for the bill. I asked him for the bill, he said "of course" - and promptly disappeared. And so, after waiting for another while, I'd had enough. I got up, slowly put on my coat, and strolled to the exit. Past the serving stations, past the waiters stood there chatting, through the door, and out through the seating area. No-one noticed, no-one followed me. I call that karma. Makes the service so much more palatable if you get the food for free.. Needless to say, I'm never going back there anyway.

Tomorrow, I'm booked with Walks, Talks and Treasure Hunts again for A Nosey Around Soho. In association with London Guided Walks as usual, a £3 discount for using the code MEETUP3, which at least covers the booking fee. Looks like Hazel herself is running this one - if so, it'll be the first time I'll have seen her in years. Assuming I'm not a couple of minutes late, and miss her. Well, if I do get to go, I hope she doesn't spam me, like she still is after the last one, with constant ads for her podcast and requests for reviews! Of course, if you go on her site, there seems to be no way to leave a review.. AND I see she advertises these on TAC now, with a £3 cash charge on the day to the guide - still, this would be the cheaper option. (and ACLUB also gets you a £3 discount on the full price..)