Films: Seventy Percent + Hollow Road + Crazy Golf + The Herd + Devil Makes Work + Vomica + Killer Road

When I was looking for a film for tonight, several films showing only at the Shortwave Cinema were at, or near, the top of the list. However, I've had problems with that listings website before, and am in the habit of checking the cinema website too - which, in this case, mentioned none of them! Even after a search. So I figured the listings website had got it wrong, and decided to go to The Forecaster instead, as the next-highest IMDB-rated film for today.

What a good thing Helen was back today - she's been away for the past while. I mentioned this to her, and she started hunting around.. and found out that the London Independent Film Festival is on this weekend.. at the Shortwave Cinema! Turns out that's what all those missing films are showing in! Now, this must be the worst advertised festival I've ever heard of. It's all happening at the Shortwave Cinema, which, it turns out, does mention it - at the bottom of the homepage. It mentions nothing else about it, but it is kind enough to provide the URL. Not clickable, mind.

The LIFF website, when I tried it today, wouldn't load for ages. When I finally persuaded it to, I saw that the clickable date range on their calendar is wrong. It took me longer still to get through to a schedule page. Really, do they WANT customers?! When I eventually got through (having despaired at this point), I thought it might have been a surge in demand, so I booked: not just for tonight, but tomorrow night as well. Payment is through Paypal, by default. At least tickets are only £5, with no booking fee! I didn't get a printable ticket, but printed the Paypal emails as confirmation.

It took me most of the day to realise I'd never been there before, and needed to look up the route! Unfortunately, it's all the way over the other side of town. Google Maps suggested District Line, then a bus. I had a choice of two places to change from Tube to bus, and decided that Tube was more reliable, and I'd take it as far as possible. That meant Tower Hill. I was unfamiliar with the bus stops, so decided to avail of TFL's handy facility to print from the website the same street maps they have on bus stops, showing the surrounding streets, stops, and connecting buses. Unfortunately, the office printer decided to throw a wobbly, and I had to do that at home. In greyscale, and enlarged, to see the detail.

And off I dashed, leaving the house about an hour before start time at 8. I was truly blessed with transport tonight. As I scurried down the stairs at West Brompton, the train to Tower Hill was just pulling in - the last I could've got to make it in time! It was suitably relaxed making it to its destination, mind - but we got there at 7:40. I exited to the most gorgeous views of the Tower, although I'd have needed to be at a higher angle to get a decent shot:

Tower Bridge is visible in the background of the first photo, the Shard in the second. Talk about old & new!

I was worried I'd miss my bus with the photo-taking, but couldn't resist. I wasn't quite sure where my bus stop was, but knew it was on Tower Bridge Approach, which was easy to find, with its distinctive blue and white railings. Again, my luck was in, as my bus was approaching as I ran for the stop! And some minutes later, I disembarked when it turned off to the left, doubling back to Tower Bridge Approach again, which I knew I'd have to cross. I hadn't been able to find the Shortwave Cinema specifically on Streetview, but figured I probably turned into a pedestrian area beside a large, chequered board that probably passed for street art. Sure enough, this brought me to Bermondsey Square, with the Shortwave Cinema at the other side. And with three minutes to spare!

The building is basically a long bar with a cinema at the end. I asked at the end of the bar, where it said "Box Office" - I thought I'd have to pick up a ticket. But he didn't have a clue, so I just mooched around until they opened the door. This took ages. They had to wait for the previous screening to finish - I think it ran over. Then they had to check and clean the screen. By the time they let us in, I was feeling decidedly out of place. But they finally did let us in. Oh, and never checked our tickets!

I was practically first in, and chose a decently central seat in what is a tiny cinema. It did fill up, pretty much - which is reason enough to book. What I'd booked for was a block of horror shorts (horror two days in a row, goodee!) When the guy read out the list though, the very one that had inspired me to come wasn't showing. What the hey.

It was a very mixed bag. The opener, Seventy Percent, is a vignette of a group of guys playing poker. Until one of them starts to feel unwell - and explodes in a shower of.. water, of course! I seem to remember Crazy Golf was next - a rather gory end to a young couple's date, when they fall out over the game. The next, Hollow Road, replaced the aforementioned film I'd come to see - in this one, a little boy and his family are headed on holiday into the woods, when they come across a disturbing hitchhiker.

After that, they got more disturbing. The Herd.. basically replaces cattle with women. Who are caged, artificially inseminated, and milked after giving birth. Male children are slaughtered, females kept to be bred in the same way. I get the impression that the filmmaker is a vegetarian.. I do like the comeuppance for the woman who does the inseminations, though!

Devil Makes Work is a very visceral, very visually striking piece where the devil points out to us the sources of evil. Nice piece. Vomica is particularly interesting, taking its inspiration from the Cthulu mythos, with a WWII British soldier being interrogated about his unit's storming of a Nazi stronghold. We're not quite sure what happened, but the mission seems to have been a failure, and it all hinges on what the soldiers saw in the crypt hidden under the trapdoor with "Vomica" written on it (which is, apparently, the Latin for "Plague"). Terrific imagery.

Finally, Killer Road shows us the perils of strangers on the road. A bit of humour to lighten up the night, and an excellent programme overall. The festival ends on Sunday - catch it if you can! Afterwards, I found the toilets at the other end of the bar, with the gents clearly visible at the end and the ladies less visible, but right beside it. Yet again, I was lucky with transport, with my bus sitting and waiting for me at the stop, not far from the exit from Bermondsey Square! Google Maps suggested I take the bus to Tower Gateway, but I alighted on the bridge, to take more photos.. it's gorgeous at night:

And once more, my train was waiting for me on the platform. We had to change at Earl's Court though, apparently because there was congestion on our branch, which meant our train changed destination. But I had just a minute to wait for the next one.

Tomorrow's film is Garnet's Gold, and of course I know the way now. And there are eateries round about, if I feel like eating there. And on Sunday, I'm back to Meetup - heading on my first trip with the London International group: a trip to Salisbury and Stonehenge! Now, that'll be good, because I've never been to either before. And they're celebrating St. George's Day, with a pageant and such. And we get to see Magna Carta. And when Helen heard all this, she decided she couldn't resist - so she's joined up as well! Just hope the weather's ok.