Tonight, I went to see Smashed, the headline act of this year's Underbelly (or Udderbelly) Festival. I checked, and despite the Tube strike, the District Line into town was pretty much operating as normal, albeit a reduced service. So I wasn't worried about how to get there.
Well, what a crowded journey I had. If you have ever thought there were just too many people in the world, this trip might have confirmed your worries. Firstly, you see, there's a big soccer match this evening in Stamford Bridge, which is just down the road from me. Cue large crowds of people on the pavement, in particular outside all the local pubs, and also thronging West Brompton Station. Not that they were all going to the match, mind. A lot of them were heading into town, like me. So the platform was crowded, and the train was crowded.
When we got to Earl's Court, someone near me - with a seat - got off, and the fellow near it let me have it. Phew! Thank the Lord for chivalry. Because the scenes at Earl's Court were scary. There were, I believe, more people on the platform trying to board the train than were on the train already. And the train was pretty well full. I hid in my seat and let them all crowd around.
We didn't stop at Gloucester Road, and wouldn't have stopped at Sloane Square either, but there were people on the platform, although I think it was supposed to be closed. There was some relief at Victoria, of course, where a lot of people always get off because of the mainline rail and bus stations. There was some oxygen after that, and you could actually see the doors! And finally it was Embankment, my stop.
I had to cross the bridge this evening, surrounded by suits. A lot of people doing more walking than usual. Anyway, I hadn't really remembered exactly where the upside-down purple cow that is the Underbelly (or Udderbelly) tent is located, but it said on the ticket that it was between the bridge and the London Eye. So that's a right turn off the bridge. It's not hard to spot the box office this year - a large wooden construction. I soon had my ticket.
I was hungry - hadn't had time to eat beforehand. There is a fast food area outside the tent. I had a choice of burgers or hot dogs, basically - checked the burger menu and decided the hot dogs sounded more appealing. Unfortunately, both I and the guy in front of me arrived at just the time that both the chips and the bread buns weren't quite ready yet. I don't really know why she felt the need to toast the bread buns, but she did. Finally, probably seeing my anxious glances towards the tent, whose doors had opened now - it wasn't long till the performance - she asked whether I'd be ok with having them hot but white. YES!! I finally got my hot dog as the guy at the tent door was announcing five minutes to go to the show. Just as well I hated the sausage. I should have known better - can't stand British sausages. I dumped it and went in.
The guy who took my ticket advised me that I could sit anywhere except the "private" seats. Ok. Went in. Eh - where were the "private" seats?! There were no signs to indicate. I just took a seat in the side section, which was empty.
The stage had a number of apples, strategically positioned. The first part of the show consisted of apple juggling, in various permutations, with people juggling while dancing with each other, fighting with each other, teasing each other. Clever enough.
For the rest, I refer you to the review I just posted on Time Out. I felt obliged, since the reviewer thought so much of it..
The reviewer thinks there's a lot more going on here than "a lot of old balls". I disagree. I think there's a lot less. I acknowledge the Pina Bausch references, and the first part of the show is accomplished enough. But the second, "darker", part is just a descent into ugly slapstick. This isn't a juggling show any more, it's not entertaining. And if you're trying to make some kind of connection with a critique of fascism or the like, I'm sorry, it's too disjointed for that and I don't think it holds up. I left when they were all crowded around the black performer, about to pour tea on him. I'd had enough, having just spent the past ten minutes watching them deliberately smash things and shout insults at each other. Sorry, too out there for me!
This show is dreadful. Please, avoid like the plague!! As one performer shouted at the audience at one point, "What a load of pretentious nonsense!" Indeed. I should have left a lot sooner than I did. At least the Tube was less crowded on the way back.
(I would have posted a link to it, but the Underbelly site seems to be down. What the hey, at least you won't be tempted to book, eh? I see they're running Limbo again - that's probably a better bet.)
Tomorrow is looking like a film, specifically The 400 Blows, a French film from 1959, showing at the Prince Charles Cinema. Just as well the strike ends tonight (for the week) - that would be complicated otherwise!
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