Well, I had to stay late at work for a meeting - occupational hazard of working with California - and ended up heading straight for Leyton. (Ironic that I'm back on public transport so soon, and me in the middle of everything.) I did indeed get the Central Line straight to Leyton Station, then had a tortuous, twisty walk through housing estates to get to the Plough and Harrow. I'd never have figured it out on my own.. now ,with all the Wazeing I've been doing this month with the flat move, I've exceeded my data allowance, and had it on flight mode, so was absolutely delighted to see that it was still tracking me. Big Brother is good sometimes, eh? (I've uninstalled Waze now - it's really useful, but since it's just about impossible to switch off, if you don't have an unlimited data allowance, it's penurious.)
Finally, at the end of the road, I came across a large pub - which was it. Attached myself to the WiFi I suddenly came across, and - with no obvious indication of which entrance I should use - went in the first door I came to. Well, it was bedlam! I was quite early, and the performers were just primping and setting up in the bar area. Makeup, wigs, sequins.. I spotted a food menu on the bar, and had chosen by the time I spotted the landlady. With an Irish accent, she assured me that yes, they were doing food - I'd wondered, in this commotion - and found me the waiter. who said if I needed to pay by card, she'd take it - luckily, I had cash; this is another place that levies a fee for card use - under £15, in this case.
When someone appeared who vaguely looked like he was in charge - and stared at me inquisitively - I explained that I was there to watch, not perform. Ah, he said - would you mind going into the bar next door then? (pointing.) Eh, ok - I mean, I had got my wine by now, and there was this sign on the door saying not to take drinks outside.. sod it. So I strolled along till I found another door, and there was the main bar - gosh, just like what I remember of rural Irish pubs when I was a kid! A large room, kind of sparse - tables around the edges, a pool table in the corner, and most activity happening around the bar counter. Not many people schlepping about..
Then it occurred to me that I'd ordered my food in bar No. 1. There was someone different behind the bar here, and I couldn't see the people I'd ordered from before - oh God, I decided I'd better go back and find them. So I did - no sign of official person, but after a bit the Irish lady came through, and I explained to her what was happening. No problem, she said, she'd send it through. So I went back to bar No. 2 and took a table in the corner.. read the copy of the Sun that someone had left on the table.. perused the bookshelves I was sitting beside.. got a funny look from the waiter who recognised me from bar No. 1.. and waited for my dinner. Which took so long that I worried I'd miss the show. What the hey, I was hungry - and when my chicken burger came, it was delicious! I finished at about 8.10.
Trotted back into bar No. 1, where they still hadn't started - well, they were only 10 minutes late. Checked my name off the list, and the guy gave me a programme - with space to vote - and a pen. How organised is that! They really cared that you voted. There was also an app you could use for it, but it turned out I couldn't connect to the WiFi specifically designated for voting. Until the voting was over, and it got in the way of the other WiFi. Figures. Anyway, they also took paper offerings - as I say, very organised, all bases covered! I got another drink - v good value, at £4 - and found an unobtrusive seat near the front.
And we were off.. All human life was here - young, middle-aged, fat (most), thin, men in drag.. the compere asked who'd come the furthest, and the prize went to a large contingent from Sheffield, who'd booked the table just in front of me. They had a couple of young performers, who kept coming back to the table, and what looked like a blind man in drag, sitting at the side. Good on him for coming out!
And what a variety of acts. The night was split into four sections, five or six performers in each. The common factor was to strip, finally exposing the breasts, adorned with some kind of decoration (usually nipple tassels). A couple of people obviously didn't know what they were doing, but 10/10 for gumption. Certainly, the support was enthusiastic - I really thought I'd go deaf in one ear from the screams behind me - happily, they moved. To my right, there was a table of judges, and past them, an artist scurried about, creating beautiful drawings of the performers, presumably to be sold afterwards.
The soundtracks were excellent - classic rock and pop generally. While voting, I started to look for particular traits - a touch of cheekiness here, inventiveness there - moving to the music, gracefulness. And by the time the winners were announced, I didn't agree with all the results - but the judges did agree with me on the winner. Rushin Blue blew away all her competition, coming on in a simple 80s power suit - which she stripped out of, of course -and flinging herself about the stage in time to the music, in singularly the most energetic performance of the night. Quirky and inventive, she was completely mesmerising. Good luck to her! And it was great to hear that some of the performers got work out of the night.
As soon as the winners were announced, I legged it out of there - it had run quite late, and I was worried about making the last Tube, especially with such a convoluted walk ahead of me. Plus my phone battery was nearly dead - indeed, it had died by the time I got back into town - and I needed it for that walk. So off I scurried, onto glistening streets and past cars coated in ice, and was delighted not to have to wait around for long in the cold for a train. And so home, with a dead phone battery, and an irate mother leaving voicemails complaining about how I was leaving it so late to ring.
Tonight, I've signed up with London Speaks Sessions, London for a Tenner or Less, and LDN Talks @Night (or more particularly with Funzing) for a talk on The Science of Psychedelics.
Tomorrow, free comedy in Hammersmith, with Free Comedy Nights in Hammersmith Wimbledon and Farringdon, and London Live Comedy.
On Friday, I'm finally headed to The Comedy About a Bank Robbery, at the Criterion Theatre. Same team that did The Play That Goes Wrong - which is excellent - so I'm looking forward to this. Best value tickets from the venue.
On Saturday, I'm out with the Man with the Hat again, after an unusually long break - this time, it's Woolf Works, a Wayne McGregor triptych, inspired by the works of Virginia Woolf and showing at the Royal Opera House. Both his groups are going: London for Less Than a Tenner (note the difference with the group name above), and Let's Do London - for less! As usual, I have a cheap seat.
And on Sunday, the ever-busy Man with the Hat is headed (with Let's Do London - for less!) to a dance production - at Sadler's Wells, unusually for him. The Red Shoes, choreographed by Matthew Bourne, is completely sold out for its whole run. Our Man with the Hat has tickets, though.. but he held them back (under his hat, as you might say), with sales starting at 11am on New Year's Day. They sold out in 15 minutes - I checked. That's the speed of U2's ticket sales.. of course, being a seasoned purchaser of U2 tickets, I managed to get one. All he needs now are a stetson and some glasses.. (Mind you, I think U2 broke records this year for speed of selling out. U2 are touring, you see, and I have tickets. Purchasing still in progress. Watch this space..)
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